Hindsight

The other day I was talking to my sister about dating and life and boys, etc. and she asked about a guy I dated several years ago and told me how much her husband liked him and how he had hoped we would work out. I was surprised because when I think back on the person I was back then and the person I am now, I don't know how it could have ever worked out happily.

I often play the "what if...?" game when it comes to guys I've dated. I wonder what things could have been like had me and whomever I'm thinking of had been perfect for each other. The beauty of all of this is hindsight. This always takes me out of playing silly mind games because I can see everything from a different perspective.

I went out with two guys within a couple of weeks of each other and both asked me why I'm not married. The first time, I had to think for a moment. I think I shocked him when I told him that I wouldn't have made a good wife or partner to anyone I could have potentially married. This is so true. I look back at these opportunities and had I married any of these men, I would have made them miserable. I can't say that I'm totally prepared for marriage now, but I know I wasn't ready back then. I would have been selfish and mean and inconsiderate and so many other things that would do nothing but make someone else loathe me instead of love - heck, even like - me.

So to the guy my bro-in-law still thinks about - consider yourself lucky! You dodged a bullet when I ended things in a horribly rude fashion.

To the future Mr. Fantastic - I'm working on it! And you'll be lucky because of all of the growth I've been able to experience by not marrying any other potential candidates.